This week marks the anniversary of Morgan chopping his hair off! For those of you who have been following along even before this blog started this may be familiar but of those who haven't, here are my thoughts and lessons learned written almost exactly a year ago... But before you read it... Just in case you need a quick refresher... I've added a few pictures so you can fully take in the "stallion tail" and all of its glory.....
03. 31. 2016
This past Weekend Morgan and I spend the afternoon/evening in Heber Utah mingling with family. We had fun catching up and enjoying the warm weather! Even got a little sun on my cheeks! We were really excited to come up because the night before on Saturday at 11:30pm Morgan said goodbye to his long locks and we wanted to see everyone’s reaction when they saw his short hair was back.
Why the long hair ?
When Morgan started talking about growing his hair out, the first question I asked was “why?” First, he reminisced about how he has been bald, had a Mohawk, missionary cut and shaggy but never long, like “man bun” long. At the time he was a student and working full time and long hair wasn’t restricted at either place. He explained that once he graduated and started his career, the long hair won’t be an option. So it’s now or never …. I am a big believer in seizing the moment, taking advantage of the time we have and not losing opportunities and that’s exactly what Morgan was doing so how could I say no ?? I tried to put it off hoping that this was just a phase, but slowly the growing process began. During the grow out, we trimmed his hair to avoid any “mullet” looking styles and before we knew it we were pulling it up in a pony! I will always love Morgan with shorter hair, I guess that’s just my personal preference.
But the one thing I couldn’t believe was how many people thought it was okay to approach someone and tell them in all seriousness that their hair was ugly or that he is “such a girl. We got so many funny looks from people but on the flip side, we were also befriended by very intimidating people. Waiters seemed overly nice and extremely helpful while others avoided us in the halls or on the street.
(Don’t worry the chemo braid is still there.)
The most impressive part was that none of this phased Morgan one bit. He talked to people whether they were intimidating or standoffish or even straight staring at his hair the whole conversation. He ignored all the inconsiderate and rude comments by friends or strangers that felt they needed to voice their opinion about his hair.
Let’s face it, he rocked it.
It has been very interesting being married to a long haired “tough guy”. Anyone who knows Morgan knows that he is just the opposite of a tough guy. He is kind, compassionate and sympathetic. (Not to say that all guys with long hair are mean, rough and rude)
I was the wife holding his hand, walking and sitting with him and catching the weird looks and listening to people’s comments. Because of that, there are a few things that Morgan’s hair taught me.
The first thing and probably the most annoying thing that I learned was that Morgan can pull off any look and has way better hair than I do. He has perfectly curly hair (the kind that goes straight if you want but will curl in ringlets if you scrunch it, I hope our kids get his locks). Unfortunately, I also realized that people can be really mean. People can be very ignorant and forthcoming with their opinions whether you want them or not and Morgan taught me to just ignore them. Easier said than done right? I was so amazed at how well Morgan shrugged off those rude comments and didn’t let them bother him. There were so many times I would just rant about someone who said this or that and he would just say “don’t worry about it they are losers” or “whatever I don’t care what they think”. How crazy is that?! Morgan would have to calm ME down after I got fired up from the inconsiderate comments.
One of the most significant things that Morgan’s hair reiterated for me was you can’t judge a book by its cover. It’s such a preschool thing to be taught but I found that all it took for Morgan to be making friends and starting friendly conversation was to have one thing in common and that was that he was going against the norm and it because those people were going against the norm I was intimidated by them and normally never would have thought of starting up a conversation with them. But, Morgan, being his great self, would chat up a storm with anyone who wanted to talk to him.
Finally, and I think most importantly, Don’t let people decide what does or doesn’t look good. Morgan has his own style and doesn’t let anyone tell him if it is good or bad, he doesn’t let it sway him either way. If he likes it, he likes it, if he doesn’t, he doesn’t. I need to be more like that. If I find something that I like I need to be more confident that I like it, even if others might not. It’s so easy to let others taint the things that you love or find joy in. and on the flip side, how many times are we that annoying person that lets our opinion jump out of our mouth without asking? So lets’s watch what we say and ignore what we hear.
Whatever you do, do it with confidence.
So as we say goodbye to Morgan’s long locks, his beautiful curls, the life lessons and the “stallion tail”. Let us say hello to all my Pony tail holders and brushes not being lost, his new potential career opportunities and all the other opportunities headed our way! But the one thing I’m most excited for, although it will be awhile, is showing our kids pictures of the time when “daddy had long hair".